How Your Self-Talk Shapes Your Personal Style

The Real Reason You’re Questioning if Your Outfit Looks Good

When we think about walking into a room with confidence, we rarely connect it to the language we use with ourselves.

Instead, we just feel that discomfort in the moment—whether it's being in the spotlight or standing in front of a camera—and the negative self-talk creeps in.

What My Photoshoot Taught Me About Self-Talk

I’ve been there. In fact, it’s still very fresh for me after recently having professional photos taken. I was anxious for a full week leading up to it—excited for the outcome, but not exactly looking forward to the process. Will what I’m wearing look good on camera? Should I go with minimal or bold accessories? Am I going to have a good hair day? Yes, my mind went there too.

The Morning Pep Talk

The morning of the shoot, I had to pause and give myself a real pep talk. I reminded myself to focus on what I wanted others to see and feel through my photos—not the perfectionism that was bubbling up inside me. I knew I needed to release that pressure, shift my mindset, and allow myself to simply enjoy the experience.

Why Your Words Matter

What many don’t realize is how powerful our words are—especially the ones you whisper to yourself. They shape how you feel, how you show up, and how you see yourself in that moment.

Think of the rudder of a ship—tiny compared to the vessel, yet it determines the entire direction. Our words work the same way. What we say, especially to ourselves, can either steer us toward confidence or anchor us in self-doubt.

So, why am I talking about this? What do WORDS have to do with personal style?

Honestly—EVERYTHING.

From Self-Doubt to Style Clarity

When I first speak with clients, the conversation often starts with their frustrations: Nothing fits. I can’t find anything I like. I hate shopping. That’s why they’ve come to me—they want help solving their wardrobe challenges. I get it.

But the real transformation begins when we shift the conversation. Through the style assessment, we move past the struggles and start focusing on strengths, values, and the pieces already in their closet that make them feel confident.

That’s the foundation of our work together—building the CONFIDENCE to step into the beautiful, intentional wardrobe you envision.

One of the first questions I’m often asked is, “Where do you shop, Annette?”

Shopping is important—it’s the outer layer, the packaging. But if you truly want to elevate your style confidence, shopping should be the last step in the process, not the first.

First, I help you reconnect with your sense of self. Because without that positive affirmation of who you are and what you’re working toward, you are left feeling dowdy, average, or feel the need to lose 20 pounds before anything will look good.

I want you to begin seeing your beauty from the inside out—your radiance—not just the flaws you think you see on the surface.

Questions to Reflect On

So let me ask you:
✨ What do you love about your body?

Not what you'd change. Not what you're waiting to “fix.”
But what already makes you feel strong, graceful, feminine, or powerful.

✨ What do you want to move away from?

Maybe it’s wearing black by default, impulse buys you never wear, or clothes that no longer feel like you.  Get clear on what no longer serves you—so you can make space for what does.

✨ What do you want to move toward?

Think about how you want to feel when you get dressed each day. Confident? Put-together? Effortlessly chic? Let your style reflect the life you’re creating.

Final Thought

Your WORDS—your self-talk—can be a curse, or they can be your beauty. Choose wisely.

💗Annette

P.S. If you’ve been thinking about elevating how you show up and need some loving help and support with your personal style, I would LOVE to meet you! Schedule a time to learn more: https://www.annettebond.com/contact

Lifestyle and Personal Style Evolution

Last October, my husband and I traveled to Italy to join my friend Theresa for a special couples’ retreat at her stunning villa experience, Retreat to Tuscany. We spent a magical week with four other couples, enjoying wine tastings, delicious meals prepared by our personal chef, Nora, and breathtaking excursions led by our private guide, Antonella.

It’s an interesting thought when you begin thinking about, “How do I want to spend my time and with who, in the last chapter of my life?” 

• I’ve been told by several people that you need to travel when you’re young.  I’ve asked, so what is considered young? The eighty-year-old woman I was golfing with told me, “Of course, it’s in your sixties.” 

• It’s all perspective, isn’t it.

• Loving life and having fun is something I embrace daily.

One of things I’m constantly thinking about when I shop is, “Where does that piece fit into my current lifestyle?"

• Is it for work?

• For play?

• For travel?

I would rather have that great outfit for my current lifestyle and be style-ready than buying something on a whim because it’s fantastic or the salesperson insisted you have to have this -  but you have no idea where you’re going to wear it.

I realize sometimes when I’m shopping, I have a very practical side to me when it comes to adding new pieces to my closet and expanding my style..

Think about your lifestyle and the things you love to do.

• When you go to your closet, do you have that great outfit?

• Do you have the right shoes?

• Do you feel you’re missing accessories and don’t know how to complete your outfit?

Life isn’t a dress rehearsal—every day is a gift to be embraced and fully lived.

Are you ready to get your personal style figured out?

Let’s have a casual conversation so I can get to know you and learn what’s keeping you stuck.

Schedule your one-to-one time here https://www.annettebond.com/contact

💗Annette

How Do You Evolve Your Personal Style?

I'm so excited to share a fresh, new take on my Confidently Styled Woman newsletter/blog with you! It’s all about my personal style and how I dress to support my evolving lifestyle—plus, I’ll show you how to do the same!

As we grow and our lives change, so does our wardrobe. I’m excited to share more with you—how I bring beauty into my life through what I wear, how I live, and how I stay healthy.

Back in 2018, I worked with a branding expert to define my core values. The one that stood out the most was well-being, and I started wondering how that fit into my styling business. Now feels like the perfect time to explore it.

I've noticed that many of my clients' work wardrobes have evolved over the past five years—fashion has, too. Today, there are so many ways to look polished, stylish, and comfortable while embracing a more relaxed approach. No matter where life takes you—whether it's the boardroom or a trip to Italy—you can show up as the Confidently Styled Woman, dressed perfectly for the occasion.

I can’t wait to take this journey with you—it’s going to be real, inspiring, educational, and so much fun!

It’s time to let your personal style support the fullness of your life.

What I’m Styling

My lifestyle has evolved—my styling business is now 99% virtual, meaning I no longer see clients in person or attend business meetings regularly. My husband has retired, and I’ve stepped into the wonderful role of being a grandmother.

So what does that mean? My wardrobe has evolved, too.

• But it’s not just about updating what’s in your closet—it’s about shifting your mindset. If you’re like me, you probably have a certain image in your mind of what a “traditional grandmother” looks like and how she dresses. There’s a reason so many women seek a fresh, modern alternative to the name "grandma." But personally? I love being a grandma.

• Why does this matter? Because words carry meaning. The words we use shape our thoughts, and our thoughts influence our actions. While my approach to style hasn’t changed, my evolving lifestyle has led me to embrace a new genre of clothing—styles and fabrics that align with where I am now.

I’m still Annette Bond—I still want to feel put-together, stylish, and confident in my clothing choices, no matter the occasion.

If you’re experiencing a similar shift and find yourself frustrated each morning, unsure if your wardrobe still fits your life, it may be time to create a wardrobe that truly reflects your new chapter.

No matter what changes life brings—whether it’s getting older, working from home, navigating a divorce, or stepping into a new promotion—it’s important to embrace where you are right now.

Let’s stay connected in my Private Facebook Group, Confidently Styled Woman

With Your Definitive Style in Mind, 💗Annette

Me: I’m really excited, I just bought a Peloton.

Response: “Nice! Wow, those are really expensive.”

We’ve all said it, or at least thought it when a good friend shares their excitement about something they’ve just bought or invested in.

Secretly you’re thinking, “I wish I could buy a Peloton.”

Is it affordability or is it worthiness?

I had a client bring this to my attention recently.

She shared; “Annette women need your help.”

• They’re busy.

• They can’t do it all.

• They need help from a professional like yourself, on how to dress and represent their best self.

And you’re thinking, “Oh that’s ridiculous, I can dress myself.”

“Who am I kidding, I don’t need to pay someone to help me shop and style my outfits, I can do that myself.”

Truth, you don’t feel worthy of investing in a professional image consultant.

• The guilt and shame of thinking you can’t dress yourself appropriately.

• That’s not a good use of your money.

• The truth is, you waste so much time trying to figure out where to shop.

• Wasted mental energy trying to figure out what looks good on you since you’ve gained a few pounds and are getting older.

• You’re winging it, you don’t have the time or talent to do it the way a professional would do it.

I get it, investing in yourself can be scary. “You’re asking yourself, are you worth it?”

Come on’ we women were born to shop. Wrong!

The hardest part, taking the first step to say YES to you.  Raising your deserve level.

After you make the commitment to invest in your image, the dominos begin to fall.

• You realize the time you save by no longer needing to spend endless hours shopping.  

• Money saved on shopping mistakes.

• You feel this amazing peace and effortlessness when getting dressed every morning, you have the right pieces, the perfect colors, and styles for your body type.

• The daily compliments that come your way.

• And the ease you feel when packing for your next trip.

• Everything mixes-and-matches. It’s now fun and easy vs. dread and painful.

Oh, and that expensive Peloton that I bought.

It has saved me hours upon hours of driving to the gym.

It gives me instant access to support my health and wellness.  

I have so much fun riding with the world class Peloton instructors.

Oh, and I’ve not paid that $150 gym membership every month for the last 4 years.

If you are tired of doing it alone and know that style and fashion are not your gifting and strength, and want some help. I’m here for you girlfriend.

With Your Definitive Style in Mind,

💗Annette

We can have a relaxed chat to see if working together is a good fit for you, and if so, you can get started right away!

https://calendly.com/annettebond2/30min

Download FREE Style Catalog:Create 14 Polished Outfits with ONLY 7 Pieces of Clothing, instantly!

https://hueandstripe.com/catalog/159H&SOmJu

Read this if you have a hard time deciding what colors look best on you but you’re still not sure how to go about it

“A colorful trend is coming back around and responding to today’s wardrobe crisis. Color analysis — or sharpening one’s personal style game using compatible colors from the color wheel — has been said to lead to more decisive dressing. The idea is that it takes the guesswork out of getting dressed, doing makeup or hair.” ~ Leatrice Eiseman, International Color Expert

Color is everywhere, we can’t escape it. But many times, you may not know what to do with it.

It’s especially stressful when you go shopping, so many choices.

How does one decide?

Color analysis has been around for a long time, making its biggest impact in the 80’s.

I was there. As I was entering the fashion industry in the 80’s I knew it was important to understand how to use color in my profession.

More recently, COLOR has led to illuminating ones “personal brand.”

COLOR plays a big role in your decision making. Everything from website colors to your wardrobe palette to meaningful branding colors. It’s all interconnected.

What is personal color analysis?

It’s a process where one learns what COLORS look best with your eye, hair, and skin tone.

1. You then receive a beautiful COLOR palette that takes the guesswork out of choosing new clothing pieces.

2. It helps you gain confidence and zero in on knowing your most flattering shades.

3. It is not only a confidence builder but gives you the know-how to use color with your wardrobe but in the illumination of your personal brand.

STYLE TIP!  Using personal COLOR analysis for clothing selection can simplify the shopping process and help you zero in on “your colors” and ignore the rest.

Sustainability.

I’m sure you have pieces in your closet you continue to keep because you love how the COLOR makes you look and feel.

Did you know, the average consumer throws away 81.5 lbs of clothes every year (that’s 11.3 million tons of textile waste that hits landfills!)?

STYLE TIP! When you love and embrace certain colors, you hang onto pieces longer.

What is a Colortime System?

I’m honored to be a certified color consultant with More Alive With Color, Color Clock System™.  It is not based on the seasons, but rather on the changing light at certain times of day. 

More Alive with Color, Color Clock System

“This is a more inclusive and international method, as many people live in climates where they cannot relate to “winter” colors; they simply do not experience those cooler color temps in their surroundings. 

Anyone, no matter where they live, can understand — through their own experience — the significance of the cleaner, sharper, jeweled tones of Sunrise hues, the sun-drenched subtlety of mid–day tones (which I call “Sunlight”), or the warmer drama of a beautifully striated Sunset painted across the sky.

Also included is a fourth palette called the Crossover™ colors that contains colors that are so apparent and prevalent in nature that they work with every palette. These include shades like Pantone’s Sky Blue, Sand, True Red, and Black.  Pantone is the most widely-used color system used worldwide, Pantone colors are used throughout the Colortime system.” Leatrice Eiseman

STYLE TIP! COLOR is the foundation of all fashion, and it makes us feel a certain way.  Why wouldn’t you want to understand how to use COLOR to put your best self forward?

Color for Confidence

My Color for Confidence program is a hybrid self-led / in-person, (via Zoom) bespoke customized experience to help women understand and discover her BEST and most flattering colors.  

Through the More Alive With Color, Color Clock System™, you will look at your unique inherent coloring, define your Signature Colors, utilize the goof-proof combinations, all of which allows you to create a wardrobe with ease, simplicity, and confidence.

You’ll then have an individualized 50-minute white-glove color session where we will clarify your best colors, mix-and-match outfits inside your closet, discern what colors are NOT good on you, and expand on how to use COLOR for your personal brand, and any other burning questions you might have about personalized COLOR for your business/personal lifestyle.

Personal Color Analysis: https://www.womenofdefinitivestyle.comcolorforconfidence

With Your Definitive Style in Mind,

💗Annette

Do you tend to question your style, your fashion sense?

As you enter your closet, you are always wondering, what should you wear?

Asking yourself, does this look good?

You’re in a dressing room and can’t decide, “Should you buy that?”

What if…you could decide in seconds if this is a heck no or an absolute yes!

By knowing definitively, how you want to show up, how you want to be seen and ultimately feeling like a million bucks.

So often business coaches will say to me, “Annette your business is 100% visual, you need to do this.”

I agree it is visual.

But what most don’t know, confidence begins with your non-verbal style.

I believe and teach; style begins with the woman and not the clothes.

I’m sure you’ve been told a time or two, you have to buy that, it ‘looks’ so good.

Of course, your stylish bestie knows best, right?

And then unconsciously you submit to the opinion of the salesperson because you are in this massive doubt moment.

You arrive home with the beautiful shirt that you were told looks amazing on you, you neatly hang it up in your closet or maybe it doesn’t even make it out of the shopping bag.

And it hangs in your closet for months.

You take it out, try it on again, look in the mirror.

And wonder what the heck were you thinking?

You thought you loved it in the store.

What you didn’t realize was your stylish bestie and the salesperson, were looking at the outfit from their visual perspective.

You are wondering, if it looks so good, why don’t you like it?

But you know there is something about the way it feels that is important.

Know one else can make that decision for you but you.

One of the first steps I teach in my students and clients in the Reveal Your Radiance Style Academy is to identify your strengths, your values, and your essence.

Most people don’t understand that when you honor what you value, you will always feel comfortable in your clothing.

Your sparkle will naturally shine.

And ONLY you know that about you. Yes, there needs to be self-awareness.

The outside world is looking at your outfit from their perspective and their checklist of what they like.

I hate to tell you this, but they are not thinking about how you feel, only how you look.

100% Visual.

HERE ARE 4 WAYS I CAN HELP YOU DRESS WITH EASE:

1. Capture my BEST style strategies that include secrets to honoring your inner beauty, to what style basics are a must, to creating a color wardrobe capsule – Get Your Ultimate Style Guide to Feeling Confident and Empowered with Ease.

2. Join my upcoming FREE 60-minute Style Strategy and Confidence Masterclass. Register at: https://www.annettebond.com/masterclass

3. Work with me PRIVATELY to take you from questioning your clothing choices to creating a signature wardrobe that is uniquely you. Schedule a 60-minute Get Dressed with Ease session to share a little about your image challenges and what you’re envisioning for yourself, and we’ll devise a strategy, so you are ‘stepping into your excellence’ and dressing with ease. https://www.annettebond.com/contact

4. Join other like-minded successful smart women in my Style with Significance Facebook Group! This is a place to share ideas, get advice, and meet others who value looking as good as they feel!

Have you wondered if you could pull off a specific look?

But you stopped yourself because you were afraid of what others were going to think?

In Part 2 of the 5 Part series, we’re going to talk about Courage.

You may be thinking what does courage have to do with style and image?

More than you think.

The dictionary defines Courage as bravery, which is also the opposite of fear.

Thirty years ago, I learned a concept from the book, Feel the Fear and Do It Anyways.

The ‘bullseye’ of a target was a metaphor of staying inside your comfort zone.

When I learned that, it was a picture I wanted to change.

Are you someone who tends to wear the same styles and same few colors all the time?

If you knew that you would not be judged, what would you love to wear? What image would you like to project?

If you never go outside the ‘bullseye’ circle because you are afraid of what others are going to think, how long will you stay in your bullseye style comfort zone?

What if you took one small step towards a style that made you feel like a million bucks?

One small step to the next circle.

Observe your comfort zone of style growing as well as your Courage and Confidence.

You may be thinking, it’s time to be more visible online or when you enter a zoom room.

Try one NEW accessory piece. Maybe a statement necklace. How does it feel?

One baby step leads to the next big step of courage.

Instead of a head-to-toe red dress, maybe it’s a red shoe. A red necklace.

One step of courage leads to increased confidence which then leads to elevating your Style Confidence.

It’s time to look as good as you feel!

If you are feeling stuck in your style comfort zone and not sure how to get out of it or where to begin, I’m here to help.

Let’s Chat, https://www.annettebond.com/contact

Does RED make you feel uncomfortable?

Do you get bothered by the intensity that RED signifies?

Cause you to feel self-conscious when you wear it?

Or maybe you can't find the right RED with your personal coloring?

As a More Alive With Color Expert, I find that many women don't always feel comfortable with the color RED.

Color does have a personality and there are pros and cons to what the color elicits.

It definitely speaks bold.

It's the color of love.

It's the color of February, Valentine's Day.

It's the color of Heart Health month.

Subconsciously, most of us associate a memory or feeling with a color.

That feeling can be negative or positive.

What feeling do you associate with RED?

If you'd like to learn what are your most flattering colors, I invite you to have a conversation.

Book a consult:https://www.annettebond.com/contact

I'm hoping you had a great week!

I mentioned last week that I began a series called, "Inside the Brand." An opportunity for you to learn more about the passion and mission I have for supporting women like you.

30 Days of videos.

Everyday is a new inspiration.

It's been very insightful to dig deeper into why I do what I do.

After 30+ years of working with women on personal presence, I forget how much I've learned over the years.

It's truly been a gift to be able to share that wisdom with you.

Today I'm going to give you a peek into "Inside the Brand" Day 13.

The most beautiful thing you can wear is CONFIDENCE.

“Beauty begins the moment you decide to be yourself....Coco Chanel”

“Confidence is the ability to feel beautiful without needing someone to tell you...Mandy Hale”

I would love to know what gives you Confidence, please comment and share your thoughts.

Happy February! It’s the month of love, passion and Valentine’s Day! Are you a woman who loves to wear a flicker, bonfire, or forest fire of RED?